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Obama: These Candidates are Terrible (But PLEASE Vote For Them!)

On Thursday, former President Barack Obama appeared to acknowledge that the current Democratic crop of presidential candidates was…um, less than attractive to the modern American, much less the modern liberal. But in remarks to donors in Silicon Valley, Obama said it was every Democrats voter’s duty to simply hold their noses and pull the lever for the eventual nominee because…well, just because, dammit!

“Everybody needs to chill out about the candidates, but gin up about the prospect of rallying behind whoever emerges from this process,” Obama said. “There will be differences, but I want us to make sure that we keep in mind that, relative to the ultimate goal, which is to defeat a president and a party that has taken a sharp turn away from a lot of the core traditions and values and institutional commitments that built this country, they’re relatively minor.

“The field will narrow and there’s going to be one person, and if that is not your perfect candidate and there are certain aspects of what they say that you don’t agree with and you don’t find them completely inspiring the way you’d like, I don’t care,” he continued. “Because the choice is so stark and the stakes are so high that you cannot afford to be ambivalent in this race.”

So yeah. Obama says: If you don’t like the Democratic Party nominee, shut up and vote for them anyway. It doesn’t matter if it’s a bumbling former Vice President who has a thing for sniffing hair and a son involved in every shady thing this side of murder. It doesn’t matter if it’s a lying professor who can’t be honest about her radical dream of remaking America. It doesn’t even matter if it’s a billionaire New Yorker who changes party whenever the mood strikes him. All that matters is beating Trump.

Come to think of it, they tried a version of this message not that long ago. We believe it was in that long-ago year of 2016.

Welp, maybe this time it’ll work out for ‘em.

Written by Andrew


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